Well id like to say thanks to koko. you made me think about a few things mainly how i felt when i was younger and realised that i wasnt like the other boys. (mostley it was the love of the sound of music wizzard of oz and the fact that as other boys were cheering the school rugby team on because they wanted them to win i just wanted to watch them run arround in those skimpy uniforms)

anyway inspired by kokos thread i dug out my old diary and it shocked me id compleatly forgotten what it was like when i was confused wbout my feelings for men. Reading the diary i rememberd how alone i had felt how I had believed that i must have something wrong with me that i wasnt normal. The diary went to some very dark places occupied by fear and pain. but as i read on i found that things did change i felt more seccure i cant really say what it was that made me go through this change possibly it was my whole environment and the fact that at highschool age people want to rebel. I found that some how i realised without external help who i really was.

I was lucky the diary reaches a point where i tell my mum and sisters and they accept it sure there are arguments one sister dosnt speak to me for a year and my father ha never really accepted it.

Reading it all remeinded me how hard it is to deal whith you sexuality i found that its important to be true to yourself as telling yourself lies will eat you up and cause you pain be true to yourself and being true to others will follow

(Sorry for all the sentimental poo but just thought it may help also wanted to know does anyone else wish to share their story.